


Lost Without You

by Frazi



Series: Bonds of Brotherhood [1]
Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Angst, Brotherly Love, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Lucifer being angst, Mammon being himself, Romance, Self-Flagellation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:02:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24177097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frazi/pseuds/Frazi
Summary: Mammon is tired of Lucifer making his favorite human cry. But the bonds of brotherhood sometimes demand great sacrifice.
Relationships: Lucifer/Main Character (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Main Character/Mammon (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Mammon (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Bonds of Brotherhood [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1744972
Comments: 6
Kudos: 81





	Lost Without You

**Author's Note:**

> There is a very interesting dynamic between these two brothers. I wanted to explore it a little more. This is my first attempt.

No one knew the things I would do for my brother.

I had lost count how many times I stood in the shadows as she left his room in tears.

And I had no idea what was different about today. Maybe it was me. Maybe I had had enough. For months I had followed her to her room, walked in teasing her if her tears had subsided, held her if they hadn’t. Spent the night holding her hand as nightmares plagued her well into the dawn.

Today I didn’t follow her. I followed the tendrils of melancholy that came through the slightly ajar door to his domain.

Gritting my teeth, I was inside before I could change my mind.

Inside, the impeccably neat demon was standing in a wretched mess. It was his very being as well as the room. Usually neat, today it looked like something that picked up each item and swirled it around like carded wool. I knew that had I chosen to walk in a few minutes later, my perfectly capable and contained brother would have gone back to status quo. As it were, when I closed the door and stood in the destruction, his shoulders tensed, vibrating before sagging with defeat.

That alone made me clench my fists. “Lucifer…”

“Leave Mammon.”

Planting my hands on my hips, I stubbornly held my ground. “Enough, brother.”

He spun around on a snarl, the wild fury of his eyes nearly blood red. “LEAVE!”

Rolling my eyes, I met his gaze squarely. “I said enough.”

One of the oldest demons and my oldest brother stilled, the visible fury retreating back into his bones, ever present but contained once again. “Not going to pretend to be afraid of me today?”

“Yer being more of a stubborn idiot that I usually am; I figured someone should act responsible.”

Running a frustrated hand through his hair, Lucifer sat at the edge of his bed, pain and misery rolling off of him in waves. “I am undone.”

“I can see that.” Of all my brothers, no one deserved peace more than Lucifer. “Are ya gona stop self-flagellating any time soon?”

“Please Mammon.”

“Stop. Hurting. Her.”

Those vermillion eyes lifted to me startled. “What?”

“Don’t insult my intelligence by pretendin’ _you_ don’t know what I mean.”

A muscle worked in his jaw. “I cannot…do this. Please leave me to gather myself.”

“So ya can go back to being a fool? No way!”

“Mammon! You cross a line.”

“And ya better get used to it, because you need to STOP pussyfooting around this.” My older brother blinked, startled at my command. “Just, enough Luci. Stop pushin’ her away. Stop denying yourself. Stop pretending ya don’t feel somethin’ for her.”

He rose in an unsteady step, torrents of emotion bubbling inside him. He was much more dangerous now that I’d ever seen him. Not even in battle did he look so broken and bleeding. “I feel…too much,” he gasped raggedly. “I cannot do this Mammon. This isn’t something I am allowed.”

“You mean allow yourself,” I scoffed, my own anger simmering under my skin. “Don’t play holier than thou with me Luci. Contrary to popular belief, I am NOT an idiot. And ya don’t belong to Diavolo. You are allowed to have a damned life. For once brother,” I nearly begged him, coming forward to place a hand on his shoulder. “Just take what ya want.”

Fear and self-loathing chased misery across his handsome face and I knew it even before his eyes shifted away from mine. Walking away, he waved a hand and slowly everything in his room began to go back to its usual place. Something dark and sad settled in my chest. I knew whatever vulnerability he had allowed himself was going away, deep under the shroud of his iron restraint. I tried one last time. “Think of her, if you can’t think of yourself.”

“What about you?” Lucifer shot back, his eyes like hellfire.

“I…what the hell is that supposed to mean?! This ain’t about me.”

“Why?” My older brother took a step closer and I remembered why it was so damned hard to argue with him.

I held up a finger to hold him away. “I know what you’re doin’,” I singsong-ed back at him with a feral grin. “It won’t work.”

“If you want her happy, why don’t YOU make her happy?”

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “Please don’t be an asshole, brother. It’s not attractive.”

“Now who’s pussyfooting?”

“GAH!” Incensed by his turning the tables on me, I paced away and put some distance between myself as his implications. My demon heart gave a lurch when I saw how determined he was. I did not like where this was headed. A part of me was telling me to run like hell. But I stood my ground, hoping to get through to him. “No! Ya do not get to offload yer shit on me Luci. I am not the patsy who’s going down because YOU are a coward.”

“Why not?” His tone changed and I realized just how dangerous he was when he made up his mind about something. “You care enough to brave me and throw this in my face. Why the hell can’t you be brave enough to take up the mantle yourself?”

“Don’t do this Lucifer.”

“Oh I see,” he leered, the cruelty that was intrinsic to him turned his face to stone. It had nothing of the vulnerability that was essential to all our beings. The flaws that kept us all sane, from becoming something truly horrific. Lucifer always walked that edge too closely. “You are allowed to throw my inadequacies in my face, but I am not allowed to remind you I put her in your care for a reason! It is YOU who is the most capable of dealing with her. Of protecting her. Even from me! Do your damned job little brother.”

I stared at him in horror. “Come on Luci…”

“You love her!”

“WHA…pffft…n_”

“Don’t you DARE deny it!”

He towered over me suddenly and I felt the tilt of the ground beneath my feet. As much as his intimidating should have scared me, it only made me sadder. “Fine. I do.”

“Then do your job!”

I swallowed hard. This was unthinkable. I didn’t come in here for this. But I also couldn’t stand by and watch her weep. “This is madness.”

“Why? Didn’t _you_ step away so she could see me better?” There was a bittersweet love in his eyes when he looked at me. I think it was for me.

I flinched like he’d slapped me. To my dismay, I felt the color suffuse over my face. Here I’d thought I was being discrete. Damn Lucifer for seeing everything! “Dammit Luci! I stepped back because I could see _you_ wanted her!”

“Coward!”

My eyes widened. “Will ya stop yer posturing!” I shoved him away, momentarily losing the reins of my control as my demon form flared to life. “I am tired of seein’ both of you in pain! And I let ya have her because you NEED her more than I do!”

For once I could see Lucifer had no comeback. My truth was undeniable. But my eldest brother is never without ammunition. “She needs _you_ more Mammon,” he requested with a near whisper. It was rare to see him request something of anyone, least of all me. For Lucifer it was mostly his way or the high way. Demand, punish, repeat.

“If she still wants you…”

“Then convince her,” Lucifer demanded now. No – I met those eyes and they were beseeching. Oh hell, I did not want to. _NOT this way!_ “Remind her why you’re The Great Mammon.” My breath stilled in my lungs. “Take her. Possess her. Fill her until there is no one else left.” A horrified shudder went through me as I took a step back. “Save her Mammon. SAVE her from ME!”

I was near hyperventilating. My lips dry, my breath harsh as I shook my head. I couldn’t.

“Or the next time she comes here; I will _rip_ her soul to shreds.”

Everything inside me stilled.

For once, I did not know if it was a threat or a warning. Either way, Lucifer had put the final nail in the coffin.

Taking a parched swallow, I nodded curtly. “Yer a bastard,” I muttered under my breath as I turned to leave. “I hate you sometimes.”

“And I’d be lost without you.”

No one knew the things I would do for my brother.

THE END


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